so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
