all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
