Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
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Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
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You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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