if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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