not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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