So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
