He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
This is the high leading the old right now
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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