U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Here’s Why Hotel Photos On Travel Websites Are A Complete Hoax
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
did i just pee glitter