I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
