Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
