wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize