Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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