You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
