he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Holy shit dude........stairs
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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