No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Randomize
