She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
