Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
