So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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