I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
