Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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