I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
