Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
