I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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