i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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