You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize