2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
