he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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