i need an iv and a liver transplant
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
