We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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