dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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