Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car