Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
