Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
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I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
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I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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