She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize