No awkward lesbian experiences without me
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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