hotel room ftw
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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