okay pat passed out under dana's car
She just used a chaser for red wine.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize