My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
