Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
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