D3 body, D1 cock
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
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