I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
