i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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