i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
This is classic penis vs brain.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
