These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
