I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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