Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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