I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
