she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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