So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize