Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
