Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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