She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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